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*** Article:
Are You Stressed Out? - By Susan Ratynski ***
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Do you have
difficulty expressing your anger? Are you unable to say no? Are you suffering
from a constant need to prove yourself or to do it all? Do you often feel tired
and burned out? If so, you are probably experiencing the symptoms of
stress.
Stress left unattended will lead to burnout. Aren't you tired of
living an unhealthy lifestyle?
We all have different sources of stress
and different ways of handling those stressors. First, what is a stressor? This
is different for everyone, but more common stressors are traffic, rude people,
bills, family, friends, too many activities, too few activities, job, health
issues, relationships...the list can go on and on. What one person considers
stressful, another might not. It is not so much a person, place, or situation
that stresses you out as it is how you react to it.
Stressor + Thought +
Response = STRESS!
A stressor added to your thoughts about it, added to
your response, can equal stress.
Connie, a college student studying for
her MBA, explains it this way: "A stressor for me is traffic. I know I hate
getting caught in it, and that leads to my getting aggressive behind the wheel."
Connie's thought of hate adds to her response of aggression, which only equals
stress.
Signs of Stress
Some signs of stress include, but are
not limited to, the following three areas.
* Psychological. Depression;
boredom; urge to cry; worry; helpless feelings; urge to run.
* Situational.
Fault finding/blaming; perfectionism; aggressiveness; smoking; over/under
eating; reclusive behavior; argumentative attitude.
* Physical. Headache;
muscle tension; high blood pressure; heart pounding; stomach problems; sweating;
dizziness.
Stress Management
Stress management involves observing
your stressor and shifting how you define your thoughts about it to respond in a
nonstressful way.
Let's look at the three main areas that stress affects
and learn techniques in managing your thought responses. Remember, we are not
talking about stress elimination, but stress management. It is impossible to
totally eliminate stress as it is part of daily life. However, it is possible to
change how we react to it.
Psychological Stress
1. Manage how you
talk to yourself. Listen to the words you are saying to yourself throughout the
day. Are you saying, "I should know everything" or "I should never lose my
temper"? These thoughts set unrealistic expectations. No one is perfect--why do
you believe you should be? Counter these thoughts with their opposites, such as
"I may not know everything, but I am pretty smart at some things" or "I lost my
temper this time, but now I am aware of it and next time will keep calm." Simply
talking to yourself and defeating the negative self-talk with positive
statements helps to lift your spirits.
2. Don't take yourself so darn
seriously! Life is not meant to be hard and miserable. Our lives were meant to
be filled with joy and abundance as per scripture, John 10:10: "I have come that
you may have life, and have it more abundantly." So choose life! Bring out your
creativity. What hobbies or activities did you once enjoy that you are no longer
involved in? If you once played a musical instrument, play it again. Read, sew,
play tennis, watch a comedy, socialize with positive, fun people, or read a
bedtime story to a child. The point is to do something you find fun and
exciting.
Situational Stress
Stress is a sign of reduced
productivity through procrastination, inflexibility, poor memory recall,
perfectionism, unrealistic deadlines, or disorganization. Following are some
solutions on increasing your efficiency, while lowering your stress
level.
1. Do only one thing at a time. Start with the biggest, hardest
tasks on your to-do list, followed by the smaller, easier tasks. Too many people
begin with the smaller tasks only to run out of time before starting the larger
tasks, and they become overwhelmed and stressed out. Start with the biggest task
because when you complete it, the sense of accomplishment will make you feel
good and help you to move on quickly to the smaller tasks.
2. Group
errands or tasks together. Plan your driving route for the day. Instead of
driving all over town with no real plan, group your errands together to help
save time. If you need to go to the post office, cleaner's, gas station, and
grocery store, then plan your route for the shortest drive possible. If the post
office and cleaner's are closer, then go there first on your way to the gas
station, and end at the grocery store. The main purpose is not to backtrack and
waste time.
3. Delegate, delegate, delegate! Probably the hardest thing
for most people to do, especially perfectionists, is to delegate activities.
Remember, you do not have to do it all. Delegate easier tasks to family members,
coworkers, neighbors, or friends. You may be surprised at how willing others are
to help you. Do yourself a favor and ask.
Physiological
Stress
Stress affects our bodies in various ways, however, we can protect
our health with the following: (1) eat balanced meals; (2) exercise regularly;
and (3) learn to relax daily.
You probably have read enough informational
articles on diet and exercise, but do you really know how to relax? Learning how
to relax daily will help you manage your stress. I personally like meditation
and prayer to put me in a relaxed state. Deep breathing is another helpful
technique. Try this exercise right now: take a deep breath in through your nose
for a five-second count, hold for three more seconds, and then exhale though
your mouth for a count of five seconds. Repeat this entire exercise five
times.
Notice how you now feel? Can you feel the relaxation seeping
through your entire body? Deep breathing is easy to do anywhere, whether you are
in the office, stuck in traffic, standing in line, or waiting in the doctor's
office. You can use this technique today, right now.
Managing Your
Stress
The main thing to remember in stress management is that you are
responsible for your overall health. Know what your stressors are, and
understand that your responses to them have not worked in the past and need to
be redefined.
Remember Connie, our MBA college student stuck in commuting
traffic? I coached her on ways to redefine her thoughts regarding traffic, and
she now manages her stress in a completely different way. "When I realized that
I was creating my own stress regarding the traffic, I decided I needed to stop
getting angry about something that was totally out of my control. I took the
time spent in my car to listen to audio books of some of my college courses, and
now I'm actually ahead in my studies. I no longer get stressed out in traffic
but look forward to the time in the car for listening to my
classes."
About the Author:
This article was written by Susan
Ratynski, contributing author to "101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life: Volume
2." Susan is a sought-after life coach and speaker. Founder and president of
Enjoy Life! Coaching, she specializes in personal and career coaching that
connects your mind, body, and spirit to help you achieve maximum results for a
balanced lifestyle. Contact Susan at http://www.EnjoyLifeCoaching.com
Her
article above is one of 101 great chapters that can be found in "101 Great Ways
to Improve Your Life: Volume 2." This powerful compilation book -- with John
Gray, Jack Canfield, Richard Carlson, Bob Proctor, Alan Cohen, and countless
other experts -- contains 101 chapters of proven advice on how to improve your
life.
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